Monday, February 21, 2005

Sucker of the Day

Proving that common stupidity, unlike professional journalism, knows no gender bias, allow me to introduce today's tantalizing bit of self-help material: The BRAVA Breast Enhancement and Shaping System! ( Yes, with the BRAVA Breast Enhancement and Shaping System, you too can enlarge your own breasts in your own home without bloody surgery or messy creams! It's easy! And so much fun the whole family will enjoy it! You'll be amazed at the difference in your shape after only a few weeks with this simple device!

What simple device you ask? Well, you can wander around the BRAVA web site for a while desperately looking for information, or you can take this hint. No, no I meant THIS hint.

That's riiiiight! You hook yourself up to a vacuum and let nature take its course. And what a course it is, too. A woman interested in elarging her breasts the safe, natural way must commit to being hooked up to a machine for 10 hours a day for 10 weeks. No kidding. And for that the lucky girl will see her breasts grow a whole cup size! Yowza! Of course the methods employed by the BRAVA system are time-tested and have been used by some of America's finest jurists for years.

10 hours a day for 10 weeks = one cup size. It's no small wonder that this also appeared in the article:
"Sarah Maddison, a spokeswoman for from the Women's Electoral Lobby
said it was "sad" women would go to such lengths for a fuller bosom.
"You also can't overlook the potential profit involved," Dr Maddison said.
"I find it offensive that women's bodies are used in that way."

Well, Dr. Maddison, I don't agree. I find it much more offensive that a woman's intelligence is abused in that way.