Friday, April 08, 2005

Well I love that Kumgangchonyonbullosu, oh-oh Pyongyang you're my home

From the Korean Central News Agency of DPR
Pyongyang, April 7 (KCNA) -- A research institute under the Academy of Sciences of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea has developed a new health drink "Kumgangchonyonbullosu" (Kumgang natural health water). Its ingredients are more than 50 essential microelements extracted from kumgang medicinal stone and various other medicinal minerals and 10-odd rare-earth elements. It, with over 10 kinds of deoxidizing elements, is efficacious for aging and diseases. A section chief of the institute Ri Won Sop, who had led the research team, told KCNA that it is potent for such diseases as chronic hepatitis, rheumarthritis, diabetes, inveterate gastritis, gastric ulcer and other digestive diseases, myocarditis and arteriosclerosis and even various kinds of cancer. When children take this water, it helps them grow quickly and healthily and increase resistance to diseases. Clinical tests proved that it has neither toxic nor side effect.
Well, well, well. The North Koreans certainly have done it again. A health drink that cures cancer! My my! What do you have to say to that Coca-Cola?
Say what's in this stuff any way? 10-odd rare-earth elements? Is that 10 odd rare earth elements, or 10 or thereabouts rare-earth elements, cause they all look pretty odd to me.
Which 10-odd Californium? Praseodymium? Ytterbium? Uranium????? EINSTEINIUM!!!!
HOLY SMOKES! Maximum Leader has found a peaceful use for his nuclear weapons program!
You first. Oh no, I insist.