Head of Institute Security Turns Five

Zoe C. On

Heres to you Miss Security Provider Unit, Manager of the Alpaca herd.

You never call in sick, and no one enters the institute without a pretty darn thourough checkin' over.

You never complain when Mrs. On puts silly headwear on you.

You always poop in the yard, like a really good girl.

Yes, you do a fine job, if we had one complaint and it ain't much of one, it's that your strict open door policy sometimes leaves us feeling vulnerable in the executive washroom.

This is a day that will, if not live in infamy, live a mighty long time.

So Happy Birthday Zoe C. On, we like the cut of your jib.