Wednesday, February 16, 2005

Scandal In The Legal Community? No way!

Lawyer Convicted For Assisting Terrorists -- Or Just Being A lawyer?

A federal jury in Manhattan convicted Lynne Stewart, an attorney that had represented Sheik Omar Abdel Rahman, whose followers had apparently planned violence in Egypt. She was convicted of helping the Sheik communicate with those followers.
"I see myself as being a symbol of what people rail against when they say our civil liberties are eroded," she said to a small cluster of her supporters outside the federal district courthouse. "I hope this will be a wake-up call to all the citizens of this country, that you can't lock up the lawyers, you can't tell the lawyers how to do their jobs."
Indeed. Of course, the evidence might be relevant as well.
The prosecution also showed videotapes of Ms. Stewart saying "good for them" when her client was told in her presence that a militant group in the Philippines had taken hostages. Recordings showed that she seemed to enjoy trying to distract prison guards so they would not know when her translator was giving Mr. Abdel Rahman messages about his followers and their plans. After one such incident, according to a prosecution transcript, she said of her performance for the guards, "I can get an Academy Award for it."

Sure, but only gay men would know that she had won.

Gender Discrimination in the Courts?

Here are the facts -- two lovers of the opposite sex. One asks for sex. The other refuses. The rejected responds by mutilating the genitals of the rejecter. The sentence? Two and one half years. Warning: before clicking the site, men, go ahead and clench your butt cheeks now. The question: now what would be the reaction if the mutilated had been female?

How Long Is That Again?

prosecutors in Spain seek 222,000 years for terrorist suspects. But with time off for good behavior, they will likely be out in only 50,000 years.

Does That Thing Come With A Safety Valve?

Judge in Oklahoma is charged with indecent exposure for using a pump devise to masturbate while he was sitting on the bench in three trials. A summary of the charges, per The Smoking Gun:
Thompson exposed himself during three separate 2003 cases (two of which were murder trials). For example, on May 13 . . . Thompson loudly pumped himself up. Two court employees told investigators that they saw Thompson . . . attach the suction device to his penis, while five jurors reported hearing whooshing sounds, which they thought were coming from either a bicycle pump, blood pressure cuff, or an air cushion on the judge's chair.

Why the pump? The Judge said that he didn't want to have to shave his hands.

Another Example Of The Non-jury Trial At Work.

A crowd of Shiite Muslims spot a suspected suicide bomber at their religious celebration. Fearing he might blow himself up before a temporary restraining order could be obtained, they beat him to death. No appeal is expected.

He Should Have Argued They Were Euthanized.

Twelve year old Christopher Pittman killed his grandparents. Fifteen year old Christopher Pittman was convicted for it. His defense: Zoloft made him do it.
Defense attorneys had urged the jury to send a message to the nation by blaming Zoloft for the killings. They said the negative effects of Zoloft are more pronounced in youngsters, and the drug affected Pittman so he did not know right from wrong.
"We do not convict children for murder when they have been ambushed by chemicals that destroy their ability to reason," attorney Paul Waldner said.
Actually, under the facts of this case, we wouldn't have convicted him only if the jury had been ambushed by chemicals.

I don't think any of these lawyers have dedicated themselves to protecting the Man. Or even maintaining the status quo.