Sunday, April 03, 2005

An Inquiry Into The Nature And Mental Wealth Of Bloggers

As most of you know, the workload at the Institute packs a hefty daunt, nonetheless we have undertaken a comprehensive study of the blogosphere and the many characters who are what has become fashionable to call "bloggers". This will be an ongoing study, the Institute will make public our findings as we find said findings, but will refrain from publishing any conclusions until we find a conclusion.

To begin the study, I sent out the following e-mail to a random selection of bloggers (n=16).

For those of you who do not know me, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Pile On and I am the resident of the John Locke Chair at The Ebb & Flow Institute. EFI is a research foundation dedicated to liberty, human dignity and the natural rights of man.

We are currently undertaking a study of the blogosphere and the personalities that make the b-sphere what it is today. We are going to insert a thermometer into the rectum of the blogosphere and takes its pulse, so to speak.

I have instructed my staff to come up with some simple and yet very revealing questions for a diverse cross-section of bloggers. You have been carefully selected to participate in the first question of this study. Please take a moment to answer this one question. Your participation in this endeavor is greatly appreciated.

Question 1.

Do you like pudding?


Thank you,


Pile On®


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At the time of this publishing we have received the following responses. While not all have responded, we consider a non-responsive response very revealing in it's own right. I have included the notes of the staff analyst in charge of this study, following the bloggers response. The notes should in no way be considered an official conclusion of the Institute, but are included to give you a glimpse into the mechanisms of big time research.




EFI Research question 1. Do you like pudding?

Jeff @ Beautiful Atrocities

NO.

And that includes flan.

Direct to the point, just the facts. Probably a hard news investigative blogger. Interesting though, he feels the need to elaborate briefly into other dessert products. Likely an international blogger.....probably.....probably Asia.

John @ Wuzzadem

It depends.

Evasive, somewhat noncommittal. Probably has undergone an ideological transformation of sorts.

Attila Girl @ Little Miss Attila

Yes. Especially lemon pudding, or rice pudding.

But I like pie just a little bit better.

Best,

AG

A very positive response. Gives suggestions in case we might be serving pudding. Hopeful for something better. Smart. Wishes us the best, shows a real respect for scientific research.


KJ @ No Government Cheese

Yes, but it is often better when accompanied by whipped cream. Tapioca, banana and chocolate are the best.

Creative. Quite likely thinking of uses for pudding other than gastronomical.

The Therapist @ The Therapist

I love pudding, especially the Oreo, crumbled cookie instant.

Clearly a trained psychologist. This answer is cleverly designed to reveal nothing about him as a person or his feelings about pudding. The man has ice water in his veins.

Cassandra @ Villainous Company

Yes I do, you fool :)

Chocolate pudding.

I can't believe you emailed Glenn Reynolds and Oliver Willis.

Practical thinker. Can't understand why anyone wouldn't like pudding. We also sense a tinge of envy for not having come up with this research angle herself.

Confederate Yankee @ Confederate Yankee

Yes, especially on a nice snack cracker. There's nothing that quite compares with pudding on the Ritz.

Clever wordsmith. Goes for the shock value, site is probably something like Howard Stern meets Michael Savage.

Dan @ Riehl World View

As a staunch Jello-ist, I deeply resent the biased nature of your survey and will thank you to not trash my email account with similar rubbish obviously designed to set we Jello-ists back decades. Do you realize that there was a time in this country when Jello was not allowed in pudding bowls? That Jello was confined to the back of the grocery store shelf as a second class dessert? I hope you have a good attorney, as this little joke will not prove to be fat free, hate monger! Whereas, I might point out to you that, Jello, though certainly not all Jello-ists, is. In point of fact, Jello-ists even allow fruits in their dessert, unlike close-minded, fruit phobic pudding-ists of your ilk.

Good Day, Sir,

Dan

Rational, level headed. Will likely rise to the top of a crowded blogosphere field, or extremely unhinged. Requires more research, but certainly there is no middle ground with this one.


Jack @ Tigerhawk.

**crickets chirping**

Jack went to a New Jersey blogger hootinany at an American Legion Hall on saturday. Someone might want to check on him.

We received non-responsive responses from the following bloggers.

Jeff @ Protein Wisdom, Duncan Black @ Atrios, Captain Ed @ Captains Quarters, Hugh Hewitt @ Hugh Hewitt, Michelle Malkin @ Michelle Malkin, Glenn Reynolds @ Instapundit, Oliver Willis @ Oliver Willis

It is difficult to say why someone might choose not to participate. It could be anything from blog envy, ideology, or even resentment of scholarship. Or it could be a complete misunderstanding of what we are trying to accomplish with this very important study.

A special thanks to Jack @ Tigerhawk, who has a very comprehensive blogroll.


***ATTENTION: IMPORTANT UPDATE***

It appears Hugh Hewitt did reply, only his response went to Dan @ Riehl World View, whose response went to everyone, which is all very confusing.

Hugh Hewitt @ Hugh Hewitt

Pudding is a blue state dessert.

I never touch it.

Hugh Hewitt

Yeah, and that response was sent on April Fools Day.